Contemporary Indian Woman – I spot you!

My intrigue and dilemma with the Bindi started at the age of 10 when I went to school in North India. Associated with marriage and femininity, the practice of wearing a Bindi is a Vedic tradition that women in India follow as a conformation to the spirit of womanhood and marriage. Being a south Indian wearing a Bindi was normal and expected of all South Indian Hindu girls, married and unmarried alike. In the North what I noticed was that only married women would wear Bindis along with Sindhoor in their Maang. I remember being teased as a child and with the overwhelming need to be accepted and blend in I conveniently forgot to wear it a few times and then slowly gave it a miss altogether. My parents did not complain or rather failed to spot my obvious omission.

Now it is more common for south Indian women to Not wear the Bindi or the Mangalsutra. I see this happening not only when they wear western clothes but also when they wear Indian clothes. Of course the Bindi does not go well with the Western Attire and neither does a heavy Mangalsutra with a Pant Suit, yet I do sometimes wonder if the lack of wearing a Bindi goes beyond the fashion statement? Is the contemporary South Indian Woman creating her own identity beyond the Bindi? Does wearing a Bindi feel like a cow being branded and wearing the Mangalsutra like the proprietary mark of being owned by her man? Either way I have seen many a Saas-Bahu and Maa-Beti caught in this intersection. I know of a friend of mine who while wearing western clothes will wear her Bindi sticker while at home and take it off when she moves out, and promptly puts it back on when its time to head back home. This she explains is to appease her mother-in-law, for whom the Bindi signifies her son’s very existence! Surely, there is no harm in aping the west in language and look, if you can carry off the look and it makes you feel in control of your life then go for it! Then again maintaining the sensitivities of your family like my friend have their own merit in this fast changing world!